Mighty Red Pen

June 4, 2009

Apostrophe’s!

Filed under: Apostrophe catastrophe,Perilous punctuation — mighty red pen @ 7:21 pm
Tags: ,

It’s Apostrophe Day at MRP! First, a poem (hat tip to SPOGG for this one):

Apostrophe to the Apostrophe
by Eric Nelson

Small floater, you stay above the fray,
a wink at nothing’s nod, a raised brow
watching p’s and q’s, a selfless mote
between I and m, a little horn of plenty
spilling plurals, disdaining the bottom line.

Unlike your twin relatives—groupies of wit
and wisdom, hangers on in the smallest talk—
you work alone, dark of a crescent moon.
Laboring in obscurity, you never ask why,
never exclaim, never tell anyone where to go.

Caught up between extremes, you are both
a turning away and a stepping forth,
a loss and an addition. You are the urge
to possess everything, and the sure sign
that something is missing.

Next, if you or someone you know is abusing apostrophes (I know what they say: they can stop if they want to but somehow, they never do, do they? And the next thing you know, you’re getting notes that say “Please pick up some apple’s at the store” or something like that, am I right?), check out Ballywick’s 12-Step Programme: Stop Killing the Apostrophe. The time for an intervention is now.

5 Comments »

  1. funny

    Comment by Joseph Sanchez — June 4, 2009 @ 7:26 pm | Reply

  2. This is brilliant! I’m off to intervene…

    Comment by calliopespen — June 4, 2009 @ 10:38 pm | Reply

  3. Hi – just wanted to say thanks for the mention! Glad you enjoyed the post. (Perhaps not now, but yesterday!)

    Comment by Lauren — June 5, 2009 @ 2:46 am | Reply

  4. You know, that might make a good new reality show on A&E: “Grammar Intervention.”

    Comment by 3distinctknocks — June 5, 2009 @ 11:12 am | Reply

  5. […] Listen up: friends don’t let friends abuse apostrophes.  When friendship fails, Mighty Red Pen intervenes. […]

    Pingback by Updates | ducksanddrakes — June 6, 2009 @ 11:27 am | Reply


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